In my life I have never really been a church person or have really ever thought about God. I’ve been to a few different churches with friends and family ranging from Mormon to Unitarian Universalist but God has never really been a part of my life. I mean I’ve prayed on the odd occasion when I just felt like there was nothing i could do (when someones life was on the line) but God and I have never really been close or better yet should I say I have just never accepted God.

I have a hard time believing in God for many reasons and have many questions on the subject. i.e. What happeneds to all the little Chinese children who have never heard of Jesus, do they go to hell or what? (Some people I have spoken to say yes, which if thats what God is then I want nothing to do with him/her/it)

Recently I’ve been surrounded by people who not only believe in Jesus but love him deeply. These people are just some of the greatest people I have ever known, they are so happy and just so helpful to others. If there truly is a God he is definitely shines through them and that makes me want to shine with them.

So instead of just putting it on my to do list I actively went out to seek my answers. I asked my mother for a pastor’s number who I deeply respect so that I could call and talk with him about my questions and maybe get a better understanding; bring myself one step closer to being a Christian and getting saved. To this date I’ve called three times and haven’t received a call back. I then saw a guest pastor at Faith Family Church who spoke and I just seemed to relate to so I gave him a call. Three weeks went by and I just got a voicemail back from him stating that I need to make an appointment with his secretary (which i tried to do in the first place but she just keeps directing me to his voicemail).

I realize that we are all busy and wrapped up in our own lives sometimes but I’m getting kind of discouraged here. I’m actively trying to make God a part of my life and it seems that no pastor is there to help so I don’t know what to do now. Is God trying to tell me that I shouldn’t believe in the Christian story of him?

So I got to see the Counting Crows last night at the UMB Bank Pavillion and I have to say it was one of the best concerts I have ever seen. You can just see the love that Adam puts into the songs and into singing them. The entire lawn was standing nearly the entire time, people were dancing together and overall it was just a great show of humanity.

I was a little dissapointed that they didn’t play Mr. Jones but hey you can’t get it all in life.